I've be rather amazed at the stories I've heard, and I've asked my wife and female peers whether they recall young men of their generation (me) of being such social stumblebums.

Nope.

That coincides with my own recollections. Don't get me wrong, relationships are hard, but meeting girls and dating should be easy and nowadays its seems to be an unpleasant chore for all involved. My objectively beautiful 22 year old daughter doesn't date and prefers it that way since 90% of her dates (95?) are horror shows. Its seems the young men and women (notice how respectful I am of their alleged adulthood...) just don't know how to act in front of each other.

There seems to be an endemic cowardice about actually talking to a girl one-on-one. No one calls my daughter--she gets text messages. How romantic.

My dating life is ancient history at this point, but as a veteran, my advice may prove useful. Perhaps my peers will add their two cents and we can all have a good laugh.

Rule 1. If you see a girl you're interested in, ignore her. More on this later--trust me.

Rule 2. Be seen being exceptional. This may take some thought, but you only have to do it once and its a confidence builder. What do you do exceptionally well? Too may guys can't think out of the box here--basketball skills aren't the only worthwhile ones. I knew a guy who played harmonica very well, and he would play and we'd all come around to listen to him and acknowledge how cool it was, and then we started inviting him to play it. It was amazing how many girls he picked up just playing the harmonica rather casually for his friends at the various high school lounge areas.

Rule 3. Notice her notice you. You're watching her out of the corner of you're eye anyways (while you're ignoring her), so you should be able to notice that she's looking at you, or perhaps trying to talk to you. You can now stop ignoring her, but don't ask her to marry you yet.

Rule 4. Escalate, watch, escalate, watch. Start small, see how she reacts, make a slightly bolder move. In the beginning it may be simply acknowledging her by calling her name and waving as you run across her going somewhere else. You wait for her signal. Let me be clear about this--if you are in doubt, chicken out. Fortune does not favor the bold here. A woman might get frustrated that you aren't picking up her (too subtle) signals, but this is where she has the option of being more explicit. If you never get the signal, its just her way of saying that she just doesn't see you "that way". If you do it right, she never has to say it, and you never have to feel uncomfortable around each other. Move on to the next "target".

You get better at this the more you do it, and its good practice for any long-term relationship because you learn to pay close attention to the non-verbal cues that never lie. Forget what she says--watch her eyes, her movements and everything else she does--that's the truth of how she feels. The nice thing about this process is that you don't have to get nervous because you're never in deeper water than you should be.

There are a few things you should understand about men and women right up front--not every woman you find attractive will find you attractive, in fact depending on how *you* look, the proportion of attracted to non-attracted-back can be pretty high. If that's the case, rent "Shallow Hal" and think about it.

I'm in my forties and a lot heavier than I used to be, and that's with good diet and regular workouts. Its just shocking to look at young guys, 20-23 years old, way fatter than me. Get ye to a gym lout! It might explain why my daughter has to listen to guys tell her that, "...oh, by the way, Bill Gates is my neighbor..." Pathetic.

Personal appearance is basic fellas. You know, most of these trendy boutiques that sell jeans to young people (and those who want to appear young) have salespeople that are pretty in-tune with what's fashionable and what would look good on you. Look for the gay guy--they always know what looks good. Get you're haircut, shave or trim that rat you delusionally call a beard.

That is all.

Ace seems to think female bloggers are a target-rich environment. Nah.